Will We Be Friends?

So, we’ve just met. (Or maybe we’ve known each other for a while now…)

Let me introduce myself with 10 things you might want to know about me:

  1. I’m an INTJ. If you don’t know what that means, we might have trouble being friends. It’s not a deal-breaker, but it will really help if you know a little bit about Myers Briggs. (And yes, I’ll be trying to sort you into one of those 16 categories too. That’s something INTJs do: sort things so they’ll make sense.) Anyway, what those letters sum up: I’m introverted and large groups of people (or long periods of interaction) drain me, I don’t like being micromanaged, emotions are to be avoided, and spontaneity is not in the cards at this, or any, time. Knowing my personality type means that I’m aware of several weaknesses in my life as far as relating to others. I’m working on that. And if you’re willing to work with me, then I’m ready to work with you. (If you’d like to see some specific posts about how being an INTJ works for me see these posts: INTJ Mom / ESFP Daughter or Introvert Mom Surrounded By Children.)
  2. I love to read. Like, a lot. I have my library card number memorized. My librarians know me. Amazon is my favorite site because: books. Not because: all that other stuff.
  3. Mr. Darcy, Henry Tilney, Mr. Knightley, Captain Wentworth, Colonel Brandon, Edward Ferrars and then way, way at the back of the pack, Edmund Bertram (like, maybe with Mr. Collins back of the pack). In that order. If this list makes no sense to you, we might not hit it off right away. (But don’t despair because you have some great reading and movie watching in your future, especially if you end up spending any time at my house.)
  4. I’m a “comfort first” kind of girl. Jeans or a maxi skirt, and shirts made out of soft material are my usual wardrobe. I don’t wear a lot of jewelry. My makeup is minimal. I don’t like spending a lot of time on my hair. I wear the same few pairs of shoes, flip-flops, and boots over and over again. (Flip-flops = Spring, Summer, Fall. Boots = too cold for flip flops.) I don’t have anything against those things but there are other things I’d rather be doing. (Things like: sleeping. I don’t want to get up any earlier than strictly necessary.)
    anniversary roses
  5. Do you love Great Britain in general or any of the countries making up the UK in specific? I’m an anglophile. This will be obvious if you come to my house. (My decorating style is modern classic with splashes of Union Jack, and no, I am not kidding.) This may also be obvious if you talk to me for longer than seven minutes. That’s about how long I can go without quoting C.S. Lewis or Winston Churchill.
  6. Can you tolerate someone who sometimes speaks in movie quotes and snippets of song lyrics? What about someone who might just start singing randomly? Or humming? Or whistling? Or playing a piano if there happens to be one in the room? (I am guilty of all of these things.) Conversely, if I am silent for a long time will you assume I’m mad at you? (Because I probably won’t be, but I do get Quiet every now and then.)
  7. Speaking of movies, have you seen Star Wars Or Singin’ in the Rain? The Lord of the Rings? Or The Sound of Music? If no, why not? Still speaking of movies, do you know Groundhog Day by heart? (It comes into conversation a lot for some reason. See #6 above.)
  8. Do you prefer Nat ‘King’ Cole or Frank Sinatra (or really any singer from 1930-1960) when compared to any of these jokers today that consider themselves superstars? If I show you my record player and LP collection will you know what they are?
  9. Do you think my kids are cute? (This one is kind of a deal breaker. Because seriously: they are stinkin’ cute.)
  10. I’m a Christian. I don’t expect all my friends to be Christians or “my kind” of Christian, but I also don’t apologize for what I believe. Will we be able to respect each other?

mom and kids in smoky mountainsNow, here are some things about my family and homeschool you might want to know:

  1. My husband is awesome. That about covers that. If it sounds like I’m bragging about him, I’m not exaggerating or trying to make other husbands sound bad. He really is that fantastic.
  2. My kids are amazing. Also, there are six of them. Which is a lot, I know. But they’re all pretty incredible and I can’t do without any of them, so, there it is. Do you like kids in general or are you willing to make an exception for my lot? (Fair warning: they may completely adopt you as part of the family.)
  3. We homeschool. We’ve always homeschooled. We intend to keep on homeschooling until that beautiful baby boy is done with school. (Which is roughly six thousand years from now, or maybe in about five seconds, since time is a fickle thing.) Yes, we know there are other great options for education. This works for us. And yes, this could all change in the future. In which case, I will keep you posted. We don’t require our friends to homeschool (that would be ridiculous, obviously), but we do appreciate our non-homeschool friends who support our choice.
  4. Sometimes only family members who are leaving the house get dressed. That homeschool stereotype about working in your pj’s? Totally true for us, on a given day. If you stop by and some of us are in our PJs, will that shock you?school supplies
  5. We study Latin and Greek. Because we like them. We’ve also dabbled in French, Sign Language, and various Star Wars / Star Trek / Elvish languages. Again: because we like them. (And yes, I’m kind of joking about those last few, but only KIND OF.)
  6. None of us particularly loves Math but we’re all pretty fond of History and Science. (And reading, of course, but that’s not really a “subject”.) If you are a Mathlete – fantastic! Can we ask you some questions?
  7. We have lockers in our family room. Because we like them. And our house is full of 1.) Books and 2.) Board games. Most of my organizing efforts are spent in arranging these two collections. (The other part of my time is trying to keep this family of 8 in reasonably clean and matching clothes.)
  8. Some of us have trouble concentrating and are easily distracted. We’re working on this. Some of us are NOT easily distracted. We don’t do change very well. We’re also working on this.
  9. We believe in short lessons, working diligently, resting, sharing with each other, talking about everything, ordering big stacks of books from the library, helping each other, praying together, and getting lots of sleep so we can do it again tomorrow.
  10. We make plans and organize things. Then we don’t follow our plans and things get out of order. So we try again the next day (or next hour). We ask for forgiveness. We redirect. We hug. We put aside what’s not working. We dig deeper. We return to basics. We go outside. We snuggle in. We drink cocoa with marshmallows and watch a movie. We make popcorn on the stove. We take naps. We go to the zoo and museums and playgrounds together. We plan big trips. We sing in the car. We put in earbuds and ignore each other. We argue about chores. We work together. We live.

So, that’s us in a nutshell. (Some things about us are nuttier than others, obviously.)

The last question I have for you as we figure out if we can be friends: do you share chocolate?

If so, I’m in.

P.S. Want to know more about INTJs or Myers Briggs? I have a Pinterest Board for that:
Follow Karen (Living Unabridged)’s board For An INTJ on Pinterest.
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  1. I always share my chocolate! :)

  2. I suppose I could share my chocolate, but only because we’re already friends and friends don’t let friends go without chocolate.

    While Edmund is the weakest of the gents, I don’t think he deserves to be lumped in with Mr. Collins. I mean, Fanny loved him, so he had to have *some* redeeming qualities while Mr. Collins had, as far I can tell, none.

    • Mr. Collins provided a comfortable home for Charlotte (or so she claimed). Edmund is weak willed but moralizing = a bad combination. He may be a Mr. Collins in training. And don’t get me started on Fanny. ;) (I guess here is where I just admit that I really can’t stand Mansfield Park.)

      I don’t share my chocolate with my kids, but with friends: always. Not consistent, but I never claimed to be. :)

      • And he mostly left Charlotte alone during the day.

        MP is my favorite. I identify so much with Fanny. Can we still be friends?

        • Definitely!

          Wonder if it’s fair to call Mansfield Park the most polarizing of Austen’s works. It seems to provoke strong reactions one way or the other. Every time I read it I want to like it better than I do but it just hasn’t grown on me. But, to put things in perspective, I’d rather read my least favorite Austen than most of what passes as “literature” today.

  3. Stefani Carmichael says

    You sound like a kindred spirit! I am an INTJ mom who loved homeschooling and many other things on this list!

  4. Haha, this post is great! Totally get you about the comfort clothes. These days I find myself more often than not in leggings, a soft shirt, and boots. What can I say, comfort for me equals confidence! ;) Love this list about yourself…I think we’d perhaps hit it off–at least I’d always share *some* of my chocolate. ;)